“It’s Good For You”

Way back when I was just a little bitty boy living in a box under the stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the street from Jerry’s Bait shop

You know the place

Well anyway, back then life was going swell and everything was just peachy

Except, of course, for the undeniable fact that every single morning
My mother would make me a big bowl of sauerkraut for breakfast

Awww – Big bowl of sauerkraut
Every single morning
It was driving me crazy

I said to my mom
I said “Hey, mom, what’s with all the sauerkraut?”
And my dear, sweet mother
She just looked at my like a cow looks at an oncoming train
And she leaned right down next to me
And she said “IT’S GOOD FOR YOU”
And then she tied me to the wall and stuck a funnel in my mouth
And force fed me nothing but sauerkraut until I was twenty six and a half years old

I am currently trying to convince myself to cut carbs out of my life. I did it before I got pregnant with Ezekiel, and lost 20 pounds in 2 months. Then I learned of the pregnancy and decided to eat what I want because I’ll be gaining the weight anyway…

I gained and lost the same 40-50 pounds with my first 4 babies. Babies #5 and 6, however… Have added about 10 pounds each. And I wasn’t skinny to start with.

Not only is it scientifically proven that low carb, high fat, and moderate protein is a successful and sustainable way to eat and live, my husband has been eating this way for a year and a half (we started at the same time, January 2016) and he’s lost 50 pounds. (It’s not quite Paleo, not quite Trim Healthy Mama… It’s a Ketogenic diet, if you want to look it up)

The only problem is I love carbs. I love candy and chocolate and cake and cookies… but that’s really not that hard to cut down on. The problem is I also love bread and rice and noodles and pretzels and all sorts of carbs! The hubby eats corn chips and potatoes, which technically are no-nos… And he enjoys a few beers on a regular basis, so I’m sure I could introduce carbs back in at a very low level once things get going… But I am not a veggie lover.

(And I. Hate. Sauerkraut.)
So… Living with Tim is something similar to the Weird Al lyrics above (from the hit track “Albuquerque”)… All with the rhetoric that “it’s good for me.”

 

Adulting isn’t easy, and I know it will be worth it. But hopefully it will get easier as I go.

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